REHEARSAL DINNER TIPS AND ETIQUETTE
Kick off your wedding celebrations early with a successful rehearsal dinner!
What is a rehearsal dinner?
Rehearsal dinners are a nice way to spend extra time with your close friends and family before the big day arrives. They are a separate event from the wedding that generally takes place the night before the wedding after the ceremony rehearsal has concluded.
Who pays for the rehearsal dinner?
It is customary for the groom’s family to host and pay for the rehearsal dinner since traditionally the bride’s family pays for the wedding. These days anything goes. In some cases the couple may choose to host and pay, in other situations both families chip in and cover the costs. It’s best to have a conversation with your partner and your families and discuss what your expectations are
Who attends the rehearsal dinner?
At a minimum, the general rule for who should attend the rehearsal dinner is the couple, their immediate family, the wedding party and the Officiant or anyone else who is part of the wedding ceremony. You can extend the invitaiton to guests who have traveled very far or extended family members but keep in mind you are not obligated to invite more than you are comfortable with.
Here are 10 steps to help you plan your rehearsal dinner.
Determine the purpose and style. Decide on the purpose of the rehearsal dinner. Is it solely a chance to rehearse the wedding ceremony, or do you want it to be a more relaxed and social event? Consider the overall style and ambiance you want to create.
Set the guest list. Decide who will be invited to the rehearsal dinner. Typically, it includes the wedding party, immediate family members, and close friends.
Choose a date and time. Select a date and time that works for the majority of the guests. Typically it takes place 1-2 hours after the ceremony rehearsal the day before the wedding.
Select a venue. Find a venue that suits the style and size of your rehearsal dinner. It can be a restaurant, private dining room, banquet hall, or even a backyard or park if you prefer a more casual atmosphere. Make sure the venue can accommodate your guest count comfortably.
Plan the menu. Coordinate with the venue or catering service to create a menu that suits your preferences and budget. Consider dietary restrictions and preferences of your guests. Family style or plated meals are common options for rehearsal dinners.
Plan the program. Decide if you want to include speeches, toasts, or other activities during the dinner. Coordinate with the wedding party members and family members who may want to say a few words. This is a great opportunity for others to speak who are not scheduled to make toasts during the actual wedding.
Decorations and ambiance. Consider the decorations and ambiance you want to create. It can be as simple as table centerpieces and candles or more elaborate decorations based on your chosen theme. Lighting, music, and other decorative elements can help set the mood. This is also a great time to include things you won’t be doing at the wedding such as showing a slidehow of photos of the couple as children or photos of the couple’s adventures together before getting engaged.
Send out invitations: Once you have the details finalized, send out invitations. Include the date, time, venue, and any other relevant information. You’ll want to send them out at least 6 weeks before the wedding so you can finalize details with the restaurant or location. Invitations for rehearsal dinners are usually more casual than a wedding invitation and can also be done online or via email for very small groups.
Plan logistics. Consider transportation arrangements especially if the rehearsal dinner and wedding ceremony venues are in different locations. Provide clear directions and parking instructions or arrange transportation if needed. If the rehearsal dinner is in a busy area with lots of traffic, instruct your guests to leave earlier in order to get there on time.
Enjoy the evening. On the day of the rehearsal dinner make sure everything is set up and ready to go. Designate your wedding party members or other family members to confirm details ahead of time, make deliveries, run errands or pick up any last minute supplies or decorations so you can show up relaxed and enjoy the evening!
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