CREATING AN AUTHENTIC WEDDING: THE IMPORTANCE OF SETTING BOUNDARIES
Photo: Bright Bird Photography
Hey there, future brides and grooms! So, you're knee-deep in the wonderful chaos of wedding planning, and let's face it – it can be a rollercoaster ride. With all the excitement and anticipation surrounding you, it's crucial to take a step back and make sure your wedding day truly reflects who you are as a couple. How? Well, it starts with having a clear vision followed by setting boundaries.
I know this can be an uncomfortable topic and even more uncomfortable to actually implement in your relationships. But it is a crucial step to take if you are feeling like other people in your life are trying to influence your decisions, or their opinions are making it difficult for you to be true to yourself and have the wedding you want to have. By giving in to what other people want or expect you are essentially sacrificing your own unique and personal desires, values, and what truly matters to you.
We all want to please our friends and family but at the end of the day. this is YOUR wedding, YOUR story, and YOUR journey. Here are some tips on how to recognize when boundaries need to be set to ensure your day feels authentically you.
1. Tackling the Guest List
It's like assembling a puzzle with oddly-shaped pieces – your guest list. Mom wants to invite long-lost relatives, your best friend insists on bringing a plus one, and your partner’s work colleague, whom you’ve never met expects an invite. Deep breaths. Establishing clear boundaries on your guest list is key. Politely let everyone know that it's an intimate affair, and you're keeping it close-knit. Remember you are in charge and have the final say in who shares in your special day. After all, it's about you and your partner, not a family reunion.
2. Pinterest vs. Your Vision
Pinterest can be both a blessing and a curse. It's fantastic for inspiration, but it can also turn your vision board into a confusing mess. Boundaries here mean setting limits on scrolling time. Define your wedding theme, color palette, and style early on. This will help you filter through the sea of ideas and stay true to your unique aesthetic.
3. Decisions, Decisions
When opinions start flying like confetti, it's easy to get overwhelmed. Remember, it's YOUR wedding, not a committee decision. Discuss priorities with your partner and set boundaries on decision-making. If Aunt Jenny insists on a flower arrangement you can't stand, politely thank her for the suggestion but stand firm on what aligns with your taste.
4. Vendor Vetting
Choosing vendors is like building your wedding dream team. Be meticulous and choose professionals who get your vision. Set boundaries early on regarding your expectations, budget, and the creative freedom you're willing to give. Trust your instincts and avoid being swayed by others' opinions.
5. Social Media Silence
In the age of Instagram, Tik Tok, and Facebook, it's tempting to share every detail of your wedding planning journey. But setting boundaries on social media can be liberating. Keep some surprises for the big day, and avoid the unnecessary pressure of public approval.
6. Dress Drama
For the bride, dress shopping is one of the most anticipated parts of wedding planning. But keep in mind, who you invite to come with you can cause confusion, frustration, and more stress. Everyone will have an opinion on what you should wear. Boundaries are your best friend here. If your mother-in-law insists on a lace ball gown when you're all about form-fitting satin, kindly express your appreciation for her input but stand your ground.
7. Time for Each Other
In the whirlwind of planning, don't forget what this day is truly about – you and your partner. Set boundaries and carve out quality time for each other. A stress-free relationship is the foundation for a joyous celebration.
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